One Question Answered ......

I guess at least one of my questions were answered last night . The doctor NEVER CALLED ME BACK ! One thing that makes me even more angry , is the nurse told me when she asked him to call me " I asked him to call you back , I told him your miserable"
So if that cant get a call back from this guy he can kiss my ass ! I am however going to send a letter to him and his office letting them know that I do not appreciate spending $200 for a 20 minute office visit and another $1200 for a colonoscopy to be told to come back in 10 YEARS for another conlonoscopy and that was it . NO other follow up , nothing else. He knew damn well the kind of pain and issues I was having and a damn procedure was not going to fix it . It was to find out what was wrong w/ me , so when the colonoscopy did not show anything, then the next step is to find out what is going on , what else can be done. NONE Of that happened. NOW I have to start over again !

Another Brick Wall

SO after no return call for 2 weeks I call my docs office after getting the biopsy results in the mail that say " biopsy results are clear " follow up in 10 YEARS ! are you EFFING Kidding me !!! No " if your having problems come back " NOTHING ! I called the nurse answered and I RIPPED HER A NEW ONE ! I told her " REALLY... You send someone a result that says Come back in 10 YEARS " with nothing else , no please follow up , are you still in pain NOTHING ! She told me " WELL , if i were you i would do a follow up visit if im still in pain " I told her " IM NOT U I EXPECTED A LITTLE GUIDANCE FROM MY DOCTOR , Tell him TO CALL ME BY TODAY OR I WONT COME BACK , i spent $1400 out of pocket for NOTHING "
I am trying to figure out now what to do , here is my thought process at this point:

A. Go back to this doc .After explaining what a shithead i think he is to him
B. Go back to the primary care doc that sent me to him ( at the clinic i liked her well enough )
C. Find another GI doc
D. Go ba...ck to the rhemtologist I saw originally that got all this rolling ?
E. Wait until the new year when we hopefully get insurance ?
I Have no idea what to do ? either way I feel like im starting over and back to square one !

So as I type this the GI doc's office calls me back and says she's called the doc and asked him to call me so maybe we can avoid a office visit ( not gonna happen ) but I WILL let him know that I do not appreciate being left out on the wind like this w/ no direction or guidance as to what to do .

Pullilng my hair out !

Well for the past few months I have not felt well.
Funny thing I had my lap band surgery 4 yrs ago to have a better quality of life.
I had it when I did so I would NOT have a stroke, have high BP , have this or that, I did it when I did before I had any serious health issues. Now , I almost feel worse than I did before my surgery . I will say this, I am thankful I am NOT 250 pounds dealing with what I am dealing with now .


You might remember the issues w/ my feet and all that. Well my husband finally told me to go see a GI doc and figure out what was going on , to get an official diagnoses so i could go from there. I knew he would want to do a colonoscopy and I knew we did not have the money for it since we still do not have insurance. I went to the doc he told me it does look like I could have crohns disease ( which I suspected and the other doc did as well ) and he wanted to do the colonoscopy . Well its $1200 ! My husband told me to just do it. So , I had that done last Friday . Well guess what ? It showed NOTHING ! I had one polyp removed and that was it , no active Crohns. A friend who has Crohns said that just means its not in my colon .
But I am back to square one ! It means more tests more doctors that I dont have the money for .
When I have my flare ups I am in bed for days sometimes a week on end, the fatigue is indescribable and it takes me weeks to recover. I cant eat much and its just exhausting , and it happens over and over again ! So I guess after the pathology result come back I'll go back to the GI and see what he says from there !

New Tattoo

I wanted to share my new Tattoo with ya'll. I have been affected to greatly by cancer this year by all these precious children I decided to get a tattoo in their honor.
Im probably going to get another one as well . I had wanted another tattoo on my other foot for a long time. But wanted something meaningful , or was going to get a mirror image of the one on my left foot ( that's my lap band tattoo , cherry blossoms ) So a bunch of us who were involved in Cheyenne's Day of Hope Benefit went and got tattoos .
Fight like a girl was Cheyenne's moto and she use to say Cancer Sux ( instead of Sucks! )


Mine is the one on the Left . Brittney's is one the Right .


My husband who never ever wanted a tattoo is in his life got one . His is the one on the leftt. Brittney's husband's is on the right !

Getting back to Normal ? Maybe

Someone emailed me and asked me where the hell I have been !
So I thought I would try to post an update. Things have been really crazy .
Lots going on . First off. I have become or trying to become as active as I can with Children Cancer things, orgs, benefits etc. Since the death of our friends daughter, the diagnoses of our other friends 3 yr old son w/ Leukemia and another high school friends daughter w/ a deadly form of cancer its become something that , well just cant be ignored. My sisters boyfriend, his dad was just diagnosed w/ Cancer a few days ago as well. I feel like its everywhere around me right now .

As for my health problems. My husband lost his job and our insurance a few months ago . So i have not been able to go to a specialist about my probable Crohns disease.
So I am for the most part dealing with it the best I can . But I need to do something about it quickly . Between the pain after eating and the joint pain eating is quit frankly not fun anymore. Its a lot of work to eat , and when I do it I chose crap because crap goes down easier , its not good. I have gained around 30 pds that I need off. I see myself getting slowly and slowly back into the same pattern i was in 10 yrs ago before my lap band surgery , and I dont want to do that.
My joint pain is nearly constant, when my stomach acts up the joint pain gets worse.
I know i need to work out , or at least walk to help keep some of the weight from coming back on unil i can possibly get a fill ( Which i dont know if i can even get another one ) But the the joint pain wears me down so much I dont want to do anything and I am just tired all the time !

Anyway , i just wanted to give a quick up date , I will do more in the days to come. I REALLY NEED to get off my ass and do something . !

Where my heart has been :

Sorry I have been off here for a long time. My heart has been very heavy for the last few weeks. My last post was about the benefit for Cheyenne and Josh Bauer . 3 days before the benefit Cheyenne passed . It was a very tough thing for all of us working on the benefit and those of us who love her daddy Josh and who love Cheyenne.
But from some strength with in him that I do not know how he did it , Josh was at the benefit ! I would like to share with you some images from the benefit and share why Cheyenne has not only changed my life but so many others. I have decided to do what I can for whom ever I can to help in any way I can for children with cancer. This has got to stop . Cancer has got to stop . Cheyenne touched my life in more ways than I can count and the only thing i can do is try to do what i can for others for her.
Not only did the benefit raise enough money to help Josh get back on his feet it brought together old high school friends, and gave me 2 new friends who I will probably have for the rest of my life. Susan and Britney ( Pictured w/ me above) I will cherish their friendship and what we did together for the rest of my life. Thank you CHEYENNE For bringing them into my life !
Here is a new story that was done on the benefit and Josh and Cheyenne.

http://www.news8austin.com/content/top_stories/273019/community-mourns-child-s-death--celebrates-her-life

Here are some amazing pictures that an amazing woman Juanita did for the benefit. She turned them into this great video that makes me smile every time i see it !
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OI-B8ckFdFU

Cancer SUX ! Fight like a girl !

Benefit for Cheyenne and Josh Please help if you can !

Cheyenne Bauer is a beautiful sweet 12 yr old little girl. In July of 2009 she was diagnosed with a very rare, very aggressive form of Cancer called Rhabdomysarcoma. Cheyenne underwent Chemo Therapy and Radiation treatments and the Cancer went into remission in August 2009. In June 2010 after starting to have seizures, after many tests the doctors determined the Cancer came back. The tumor is now from one end of her spine to the other and is wrapped around her spine. Her condition is now inoperable. The doctors have also found positive cancer cells in her spinal fluid. Cheyenne’s Cancer has been renamed Parameningeal Rhabdomyosarcoma because they have not seen a case like Cheyenne’s before. Cheyenne is currently undergoing radiation to try and shrink and or kill the tumors. On June 29, 2010, the Radiation treatments were stopped until July 6th to give her body a rest. She will have 4 Radiation treatments remaining once they begin again. Cheyenne’s friends, family, and doctors have not given up yet, everyone is fighting and praying for Cheyenne’s Miracle, just as Cheyenne is. Cheyenne has remained faithful to her lord and is a strong fighter.



Cheyenne’s dad Josh Bauer needs help with everyday living expenses in order to continue to stay with his daughter and comfort her. He has not been able to work for the past 2 months and his income has been cut to 30%. He lives and works in Houston, Texas, but Cheyenne is being cared for in a Tulsa, Oklahoma hospital. Some of Josh’s close friends and fellow high school alumni are putting together this benefit to help the family with any expenses that are needed, please help us raise money by donating items for Josh and Cheyenne so that he is able to stay with his sweet girl to comfort her during her painful battle with this terrible disease. Any item donated will help raise money during a BBQ, raffle, or silent auction during the benefit.

Please post this anywhere you can .
Please contact Mindy at mtolbert9201@gmail.com if you can donate an item for the auction can advertise for the event or wish to make a donation .
For more information please see the facebook page for the event Cheyenne Bauer's Day of Hope

Thank you