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Ok So i am not a pig but damn do i feel like one lately . I told my dh tonight i have GOT TO GET A F'ing fill SOON ! I honestly have not felt this fat since i have been banded. I feel like everything i have put in my mouth im gaining and gaining.
I have not had to go this long w/ out decent restriction since my total unfill and let me tell ya'll it sucks big fat ..... well you know . It SUCKS !
Hubby swears i'll get one soon . But DAMN IT !! I know im bitching about this a lot . But unless you have had good restriciton for a long time then been this damn hungry for this damn long you have NO CLUE how badly this sucks. I refuse to let anything in this house that is junk .
I cant have it right now . The only thing close to junk food is granola bars.
I hate this ya'll. I get SO DAMN close to my goal then i gain and gain ! SON OF A BITCH !!!
Ok sorry i just had to vent !
I'm sorry it's so hard right now, Mindy. You are doing SO well! Have you gained, or does it just feel in your mind like you have?
ReplyDeleteVent away!! I feel for you:)
ReplyDeleteIt is OK to vent. It helps the hunger. Fill er up!
ReplyDeleteBeth , Thanks. No I have gained the weight. I wish it was just in my mind. I FEEL like i have gained 100.its the first time since i had the band I feel fat again .
ReplyDeleteThanks for ya'lls support ! I think i can get my fill next week.
Mindy
Good luck for the fill! Hunger sucks big time! Can you tell me - do you actually eat like you used to before the band or are you eating more than you should with the band? Do you ever feel full? I'm just curious for when its my turn. I need to understand how much of hunger is physical and how much is emotional or psychological? I rarely feel empty but I am always hungry and the only thing that has ever stopped it is Duramine but it didnt last long - like 2 days! But what sweet relief for those two days! BTW love your blogs - great read! Tell it like it is - its boring otherwise!
ReplyDeleteSarah , thanks for your comments.
ReplyDeleteI am eating ... umm lets see. how can i explain this . Probably more than I should with the band but not as much as i could with out it . But somewhere in between. Just an example. Normally i can eat about 1/4 of a hamburger patty . Totally unfilled I could eat all of it ( no bun) Now I can eat nearly all of it. When I have restriction the hunger is gone. I mean you get hungry between meals , but you eat and its gone.
NOW I am pretty much hungry all the time. I eat and I would say with in an hour im hungry again . Snacks do nothing. I would say the hunger is 75% physical and 25% mental .
But when i have restriction there are times when I forget to eat.
Does that answer your questions well enough ?
Mindy
Oh my heck!! I just got the band a month ago and I don't have a fill yet! So as you can guess I am ALWAYS starving my ass off and am pretty much eating whatever I want...just not a whole lot of it. I hate feeling hungry..and it's bad because BEFORE the band you could get over that "hunger hump" and it would be fine. Now it's like the gnawing pain if you don't eat...
ReplyDeleteAnyway, I am excited that I found your blog! I wrote a big huge post on my surgery you should read. My hubby got it too.
Hang in there! Don't apologize for venting....THIS IS YOUR BLOG and your blog readers need to know they are not alone in their own frustrations!
ReplyDeleteRight now, I am staring down a tray of Christmas cookies that really need to be tossed. But, I seem paralyzed....!
Onward!
Judi