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About Me

My name is Mindy and I am a wife and mother of 2 boys, Ages 20 and 12. I recently started on the path of becoming a nurse something i have wanted to do since i was 11 !

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Thursday, February 5, 2009

Mom Stuff , Are you picking on MY Kid ?

So my little one comes home yesterday ( he's 8 as of yesterday ) and tells me there is this kid at school who has been picking on him. Now let me give you a little back ground about my 2 boys.
My oldest is the jock, he was in 2 fights in Elementary and 1 in middle school . Both times he was defending someone else . Once a boy was smacking a girl on top of the head and my boy said " Hey stop " the other kid said " what are YOU going to do about it " MY Son said" Do it again and I'll lay your a$$ out ( he was 9 at the time LOL) the kid did it again and my kid laid his ass out " LOL
The other 2 times someone was picking on a handicapped child and my son , well took care of it.
In any case all 3 cases he did NOT get into trouble I made sure of it.
My youngest son is the "Brain" of the bunch , hell he's probably smarter than I am . He's going into the 3rd grade next yr and reads at a 6th grade level. He's just now getting into sports , but he has a tendency to wear his heart on his sleeve.

So back to today now. Over the last few weeks C has come home and said someone has been picking on him. First it was name calling "your not nice, your not my friend" then it was sand was being thrown at him" . So I did the "usual" tell him to ignore the kid , tell the teacher ect.
Its not helping, the kids still picking on him . SO yesterday I took Subway up to C's school for his birthday , he shows me the kid who's been picking on him , he's actually sitting across from me. So as im watching this kid , he proceeds to put his hand around a kids neck TWICE . I had to tell him to stop. He's VERY agressive and very "hyper" just obnoxious !
So today C comes home and tells me he's pushing him and shoving him and telling him " OH its just a game dumbing you better not tell" SO I have had it . C has told the teachers now he feels like nothing is being done about it .

This is the email I sent before i found out about today :
Mrs. XXX , C has been coming home the last few days complaining that a child named Bully has been picking on him , pushing him down , kicking him, and bullying him during recess .
He said this has been going on for quite some time and he does not feel like anything is being done about it.
I was wondering if you knew what was going on ?
Thank you --

I got this response : also his teacher is pretty nice but a little on the "meager side " if that makes sense ?

I know that at the end of the day C was in tears because another child told him he was the "worst friend ever." My student teacher (who has been picking the class up from lunch) told me that over the past few days C has been saying the same child has told him the same kinds of things.
From my understanding, it's mostly happening at lunch recess, which unfortunately I don't supervise. Because I was made aware of everything at the end of the day, I didn't get a chance to speak to C or the other child at length. I plan to do so tomorrow. I will tell C this, but you can
also pass on to him that we will put a plan in place where all he needs to do is let myself or my student teacher know what is happening and action will be taken. My student teacher told me that today C was telling her the other child was pushing him, but the other child was saying "Shh, shh,
it's just a game." So I definitely don't want C to think he can't come to us.

I'll keep you posted.

Here is my response back :

I was sitting next to this child yesterday at lunch and he's very aggressive with other children from what i saw , I could see that from just being around him for an hour, my husband did too, I had to tell him twice to get his hands off the another child's neck at the lunch table. C has had issues with him for quite some time from what he's said and he feels like nothing has been being done about it.
I think he's just had things built up inside for a while and that's why he feels like nothing is being done . I dont want you to think I think you are not doing anything but,
C has said he's been pushing him , throwing sand on him and calling him names, basically bulling him for quite some time now.
I will pass on what you have told me to him and I will make sure he know's to let you know as soon as something happens. I do not want Colton to feel stressed at school and he's been worried abotu going lately .
C admittedly can be a little emotional sometimes , wears his heart on his sleeve, but after seeing how this child acted yesterday I dont think its approrpiate and think C's feelings are warranted .
I hope you do not think im over reacting,
I just want to make sure C is safe and feels safe at school .
I told C to do his best to just stay away from the person picking on him and if he does to come straight to ya'll. Please let me know how things go
Thanks for your help

OK im a little agitated at her response for a few reasons. and tell me if this is just me over reacting.
1. I feel her response to she's not out on the play ground is like " OH well sorry Im not out there oh well " ( which those teachers do not watch those kids at play time they sit and talk to each other, i have seen them !
2. Second this is HER Class if one of HER kids in HER class is being Bullied SHE needs to take the time to supervise HER kids and make sure its not going on .

we have always taught our kids , you NEVER Through the first punch but if you get hit you BETTER Hit back . SO as a last resort tonight I told C , if that kid pushes you tomorrow you go tell the teacher, if he does it AGAIN you had BETTER Push him back !!!
I Will NOT TOLERATE my son becoming a "victim" because a teacher is sitting on her ass and wont take care of a pain in the ass bully !!!
I'll teach my son to kick his ass before that happen ! Others might have the take on this but I dont really care ! NO Kid deserves to be afraid to go to school and its these damn teachers being too freaking lazy to take care or call these others kids parents now a days that get kids like mine HURT. So we'll see what happens. But i'll be damned if MY Kid will get in trouble for defending himself !

Any thoughts !!! Im a making too much of this ?? ?


  1. My eldest girls are now 13 and 14, and we have had our fair share of bullies. you have done exactly what I did and what I told my girls to do,NEVER start it but ALWAYS finish it, and if you get into trouble...just leave the teachers to me...

    100% behind you totally justified.

    I hate bullies...and dumb ass teachers that just can't be bothered.

    Good for you Mindy!!!!

    Zena xx

  2. You need to send your older son down there to take care of business.

    Gitting Skinny? Honey, I think you are already there!:)

  3. LMAO Thanks Zena , I was a little worried i might have over reacted.
    And Mom, My oldest son is 16 , he might get in a little trouble giving an 8 yr old a beat down ! LOL
    Thanks for the compliment. I still have abotu 20 pds to go until im at goal but im working on it !

  4. So glad to know that other parents out there deal with this situation the same way we do. Kids and anyone for that matter have to stand up for themselves or the bullies just keep at us. Its a pity we have to teach our kids to fight fire with fire squashing their lovely placid personalities on the way but unfortunately its the world we live in. And I love the stories of your older son sticking up for other kids - that's gold! You must be so proud!

  5. Mindy, As a parent you certainly have the right to expect teachers to provide a safe place to learn. When I was a principal I had a teacher like your son's who always had excuses. Accept none. It is her job to provide a safe place. Every child needs a parent to be their advocate. Hang in there. Your sons sound like they have learned the right way to treat others and they should not be subjected to bullying.

  6. I don't think you are going over the top at all Mindy!

    A close friend of our family has 4 girls. The two eldest ones were being picked on badly at school and things ended up becoming physical. The school would do nothing so our friend took matters into his own hands. He placed all 4 girls in karate lessons straight away.

    About 3 months later the eldest girl got sick of it and flattened the boy using the moves she learnt. HIS PARENT'S then went to the school wanting answers etc. Our friend had a meeting with the boys parents and the principle. His response, if you son touches my daughter again, she has my approval to fight back. If he keeps his hands to himself, there won't be a problem.

    Good luck with it all, and let us know the outcome.


  7. Thank you all for your support.
    I am no stranger unfortunately for advocating for my kids. My oldest son is dyslexic and his old school told me for 6 yrs he had ADHD and told me to medicate him , i fought them for 6 yrs to get a proper diagnose. My son came home yesterday and said his friends were sticking up for him and were "Kicking" the bully . I am going in to talk to the principal on Monday though. The teacher told my son to " just not play with the bully " that's not good enogh for me.
    He's still picking on kids and these kids are obviously not being watched at recess. SO i'll take it the next step .
    Thanks again for listening